Muslim veils to feature wearer’s picture
An historic compromise has been reached to allow Muslim women to continue to wear the niqab or full veil while still showing their face. Under plans to emerge after emergency discussions between the...
View ArticleSatanist ‘denied right to express her faith’ at work
A devout Satanist working at the check-in desk for British Airways has been banned from wearing items of clothing or jewellery that reveal her faith when she is dealing with members of the public. Mrs...
View ArticleArchbishop claims introduction of Sod’s Law is inevitable
The Archbishop of Canterbury caused controversy today by claiming that the adoption of elements of Sod’s Law into UK law ‘seems inevitable.’ He claimed that Sod’s Law had a strong hold over many...
View ArticleArchbishop of Canterbury converts to Islam
Dr Rowan Williams has failed to quell the row over his recent comments with the announcement that he has been fully accepted into the Muslim faith. He claims to see no inconsistency with his new...
View ArticleTraditional Xmas pub fights banned ‘in case they offend Muslims’
Barmy ‘Equality Officers’ at Brent Council have outlawed the age-old British tradition of Christmas pub punch-ups in case the practice offends ‘those of faiths other than Christianity’. ‘It’s political...
View ArticleSaudi Arabia bans the wearing of berets and strings of garlic
France is up in arms today after learning that the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia is to introduce a ban against the wearing in public places of berets, stripy black-and-white tops and strings of pungent bulbs...
View ArticleBritain ‘comes out’ as openly racist
In a move that stunned many of the country’s fans, Britain today issued a formal statement saying it was coming out as openly racist. Giving his reaction to the UK’s ‘outing’, President Obama simply...
View ArticleDonald Trump holds back
Friends and supporters of the presidential candidate have expressed concern that Mr. Trump is watering down his message of ‘love and liberal building regulations’ in order to position himself only...
View ArticleMuslim leaders call for ban on men with comb-overs entering US
Muslim leaders in America have called for a temporary ban on men with comb-overs from entering the country after statistics revealed that of the 13,000 deaths involving guns so far this year over 500...
View ArticleMPs condemn Trump to wander the earth forevermore
The debate on whether Donald Trump should be banned from entering the UK has ended with MPs casting a spell which will see the property tycoon roam the earth among the festering ranks of the undead...
View ArticleMan has shock plans to enjoy Easter without getting angry
A Norwich man has caused shock and outrage by announcing his plan to enjoy a forthcoming religious holiday without getting angry. In his controversial proposal, Jim Bamford, 35, said he was ‘looking...
View ArticleMelanie Phillips appointed as Middle East peace envoy
Reaching out with love, The Times journalist has been nominated to bring peace and understanding to war-torn regions and a ‘big bag of s.t.f.u.’ for the people of Palestine. After the success of Tony...
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